Hello again, sweethearts!
In last weeks podcast, Allison and I discuss Authenticity. (Let Your Cork Float Podcast drops every Tuesday. . . you can check it out here. . .)
Without question, I am sure we deem authenticity as a worthy and coveted trait. Authenticity = Good Character. We value authenticity and view it as important, but what exactly do we mean by the term?
We often judge a person's authenticity by the passion and commitment they have for what they say and do.
When someone believes in what they say or acts in a way that is consistent with their beliefs, authenticity can grow exponentially!
We view a person as authentic to the extent that their behavior towards others aligns with what s/he truly believes in.
“When you are authentic, you create a certain energy… people want to be around you because you are unique.” – Andie MacDowell
There’s a unique and unmistakable power in knowing, becoming, and being your real self.
Personal authenticity is firmly in place, regardless of who is in your company.
Sure, your style of communication and how you present yourself may change depending on your audience, but not your actual core.
So to be authentic is not to allow a situation or person to change you, unless for the better.
To be your authentic-self requires honesty, vulnerability, and courage – and it’s incredibly rewarding.
Here's a few things I thought about after Allison and I recorded this topic.
While we can't change someone else’s authenticity – and how could we? – we may look to fine-tune our own.
Check in with yourself. Maybe there's a new download available for update! I mean, iTunes updates like. . . weekly!!
Here are some ways that may help to not only enrich your most authentic self but enrich your experience with YOURSELF!
– Awareness! Write it down!
Jot down what you appreciate and love about yourself, along with what you may need to improve on. (Be gentle...)
Write the names of people you want to spend your time with, and what you’re joyful and passionate about.
Breathe this information in, perhaps even meditate on it. Feel what that feels like as who you are.
This is the authentic you.
Are you a good representation of your authentic self?
(Ohh man, I love this part! Make this time for yourself, you won't regret it! You might even be surprised at what shows up and is most important to you!)
– Learn to feel comfortable in your own skin!
Once you understand and accept your real self, get comfortable with it.
Allow self-critical thoughts to naturally dissipate.
Forget about comparing yourself to others, including what they may think.
THIS WILL TAKE TIME. . . but it's you who will be found!
– Surrender!
Look to release any guilt or self-limiting thoughts – Again....this takes time, but in the end – relief! (remember this acronym: T-I-M-E: Things I Must Earn!)
The past is the past – it’s over . . . BUT – you must acknowledge what comes up – give it a voice, and give yourself PERMISSION to have a different experience moving forward. [**more to come on this topic because it's a doozey! ]
Be in the moment. Present and at peace with your identity.
This process will be freeing and for sure will-take-time, and that’s okay. Forward is forward so take note of your progress! (No, really! Make notes so you remember how it felt before you started!)
– Keep a Journal
Write down times and places when you felt you compromised yourself and your authenticity – what were the actions and behaviors (yours and theirs), the situation, your observations – crazy important! – and the outcome.
Keep this journal up to date – it will give you valuable insight into certain patterns of thoughts and behavior you may wish to change. (Some nights, I can't put my pen down!)
– Pay attention to EVERYONE
Most of us LOVE to people-watch.
Well then, watch!
Many people have a valuable lesson to teach if we’d only let them. (And why not let them know you 'see them' while you're at it! Tell them how much you appreciate how they are showing up! That 'recognition' will be a gift to them!)
Don’t underestimate the power of observation. I just love it!!! And some of the best lessons come without a word being uttered.
– Practice Active Listening (my F-A-V-O-R-I-T-E!)
Giving your full attention to someone else is a wonderfully powerful gift and for sure a skill.
Active listening is a sign of respect and of your true interest in others, which is a gift in itself.
It tells a person that you SEE them and what they are FEELING especially.
It's validation. It's so powerful.
Actively listening provides a stronger bond and level of trust with others, and a wonderful opportunity to learn and grow from their knowledge and experiences of how they are looking at the world.
– Accept change
Being authentic also means being comfortable with change. (You didn't think you were going to escape this one, did you??)
Be open to 'self-improvement', 'self-awareness' and your personal growth. There's nothing more authentic than changing for your better. :)
Regardless of the circumstances, remain true to your inner core.
– Align your heart and your path
You have one precious life to live. One.
How can you NOT spend it following your joys, your passions and your heart?
What lights you up?
Remember, the only expectations that truly matter are the ones that you set for yourself.
Allow your heart and your life’s journey to walk in tandem.
Those were just a few ideas to perhaps help fine-tune your authentic representation.
In short, I know that speaking your truth will allow for authenticity to shine.
It is a total compliment when you show up authentically.
It tells me you feel safe and comfortable to show me who you really are.
I am always impressed when people choose truth, authenticity, and ultimately connection.
I am not my sister's keeper, I am my sister.
Much love,
Lucia
p.p.s. Pass this along if you think it might resonate with some of your friends and family! Thank you for your support and for your part in helping to lift another person up in our quest to be our best, truest self! Thanks for sharing! :)