Whether one moves frequently or almost never, moving is an intensely emotional experience.
The underlying psychological issues involved in real estate decisions are of great interest to therapists, psychologists, and now me, your Life Coach.
Death, divorce and moving are the top 3 stressors in a person's life.
Why moving?
Because housing and moving are filled with symbolism, the hope for new beginnings, crushing disappointments, loss, anxiety and fear.
Panic can really set in around your home or your apartment.
It’s a matrix of safety, so moving is incredibly stressful and people don’t realize it — they mainly talk about the packing and the external part of moving.
If I can borrow a term used in Alcoholics Anonymous, for frequent moving or “pulling a geographic,” seeking external changes to change internal problems.
No matter how much you move, you still take yourself with you.
On the other hand, those who never or rarely move can be frozen by a fear of change.
The prospect of leaving the place that is the center of your universe or the one constant in your life can be frightening.
Even finding a new dry cleaner, deli or supermarket can stir up deep worries of impending isolation and loneliness.
Packing and sorting through a life’s worth of belongings — especially, say, if the move is the unhappy result of a divorce or other trauma (death) — can be gut-wrenching. (and now the top 3 stressors culminating together!)
And not to mention that moving can be filled with more angst than usual because people feel at the mercy of market conditions.
I have often heard upsetting language from clients when they talk about real estate, especially. Words like trapped, stuck, imprisoned and even “refugee.”
Beneath the financial calculations of the move, and the uneasiness that comes with putting all of their savings into the new home, many people have complex feelings.
One is excitement: You're off to start “a new history" a "new story" perhaps.
It’s also an opportunity to purge and create a whole new life!
Taking a trip down "memory lane" for example, may stir up familiar memories, good and bad! When I was moving, I found pots and pans that haven’t been used since my mother bottled her own sauce!
On the other hand, leaving the home, cracked kitchen-floor tiles and all, represents that classic and difficult task of adulthood, and leaving home.
There are boatloads more examples and emotions that come up.
Some realistic, some ghosts of time passed.
Nevertheless, addressing these feelings as you are going thru the process is key.
Key to reframing the issues in a more positive light. And, perhaps, finally addressing the underlying details that hold you back to making the bigger [day to day] decisions that will move you forward in the rest of your life environments of mind, body and spirit.
Contact me here (luciaferraro.com) and lets get on the phone and chat about a process that will help you make the decision that will move you forward in your life.
We'll do this together...it's less scary that way.
Much love,
Lucia