I realized I wasn't giving any air-time to the the things that were going RIGHT in my life.
But we do that, don't we?
Ugghhh...we are the HARDEST critics for OURSELVES!
Gaining clarity and adjusting along the way is the kinder path towards changing the things that are no longer serving you.
Yet we can be our own worst enemy!
Self-reflection can be a bitch, but a necessary bitch towards fostering a healthy relationship not only with ourselves, but with the relationships we hold with high regard.
Growing and evolving within a relationship is vital, necessary, and freakin fun!
Sometimes that's not always a consideration with ALL of our relationships though.
You know the expression 'it takes two to tango'?
I found I was getting completely frustrated with some of my more intimate relationships when working to evolve within them.
Sometimes responses back to me were juvenile and immature. I found myself scratching my head. I mean, we aren't 12 anymore!
Honesty seems to be an issue for some. Speaking our truth is the most freeing thing, but so many people are having a hard time with that one!
Why is that?
Nevertheless, I looked to the 'how you do one thing, you do everything' model to see were else 'it' was showing up... and more importantly, HOW 'it' was showing up.
You see there are big, obvious 'things'...and small, minute 'thing's' that are not so obvious. But when you put that damn microscope on them...boy can you see some patterns.
So I [always/usually] ask...'how's that workin' for ya?'
Because quite frankly....it's either is workin' or it isn't....simple.
OR... it was workin' and now it isn't...
But how will you know until you know?
Well, put yourself on notice.
Ask yourself to notice...really notice...how you do your 'things'.
And 'they' are either workin' for ya or not.
Then, I asked myself...
How is 'this' helping me?
How is 'this' getting in the way for my life... frustrating me and/or others in my life?
Will I be able...and bigger yet, WILLING... to shift 'it' moving forward?
Is 'it' a keeper?
Thumbs up or thumbs down?
Awareness is the EASY part! The shift is the harder part.
And no doubt, no wonder it would be harder...this 'behavior' was likely formed and has been a part of you for a long ass time! (I relate the 'shift' to trying to become a 'lefty' after all these 'righty' years! Not an easy task...think about that metaphor for a moment)
But you make the call.
Are you a 'can't teach an old dog new tricks' person?
Do you see/think/feel the NEED for a shift? A change?
You won't know what you don't know until you know! (hahahaha)
Can you feel me?
Just gonna throw it out there.
Sometimes it may help to ask the people you are in [close] relationship with for feedback. Always good input. (Maybe not easy to hear, but good input in that relationship nonetheless.) Of course expect different input within different relationships. What works in one relationship might not be working in the others. Look for the similarities.
That's what's been important to me these days.
And ain't evolution a bitch sometimes....
Remember, I am not my sister's keeper...I AM my sister!
Your greatness is found in the details!
From how you feed your mind and body....to how you nourish your soul.
How you show up for yourself and how you show up for others.
Don't take shortcuts! It may feel good at first...but eventually you will look back and wish you would have given it your all.
We will never get this exact second, moment, or day back...so enjoy every second.
Do your best and build a life that brings you joy and that you can be proud of.
Your greatness may not always be easy...but it will always be worth it!